Guardian Girl

The day yesterday: no herring, some denim

Posted in Uncategorized by guardiangirl on January 25, 2010

I looked like such a fool in this outfit, and that is putting it very politely.

Walking to the usual cafe for Sunday’s fry-up with backcombed hair piled on top of my head, magenta lipgloss striping across my eyelids and silk hareem pants billowing at my knees, I felt the eyes of the world boring into me scathingly. When you next wake up with a paranoid hangover and just want to pull on your favourite jeans and a soft, comforting t-shirt, try fashioning yourself as a dramatic beast of Dalstonicity instead and walk around town attempting to look inconspicuous. On a ten minute walk I had to phone four friends for moral support and none of them answered, probably having tired long ago of comforting me on my daily jaunts in ridiculous outfits. I don’t mind looking silly or eccentric; what I object to is looking like I think I’m cool. There’s something mortifying about that. If I could only wear a sandwich board with a disclaimer on it. The All Ages story looks pretty staid this week but this big hair/pink eyeshadow combo is really tricky to tone down.

Anyway, as usual, the photo doesn’t nearly do justice to how stupid I looked. Thanks to Elin for the action photography, although we had to reject the jumping shots as they were disfiguringly blurred.

Dinner wasn’t herring because it was Liv’s actual birthday and you don’t refuse to attend your best pal’s family meal on the basis that you have to stay in and cook fish for your vanity project.

(Happy 30th Liv. You are the most brilliant person, without whom the world would be very, very much less enjoyable. )

Strike a pose

Strike a pose

Dyke with woes

Dyke with woes

A quick update on the Measure front: I’ve seen this Kate Halfpenny stuff before and it’s very lovely indeed but when jewellery shopping involves commissioning, one-offs and/or prices on application, those of us who aren’t yet CEOs know it’s time to wait until dragonfly trinkets hit Claire’s Accessories. By which time we don’t want one. I’m not dead keen on dragonflies anyway – they’re a bit naff aren’t they. They’re for girls who have those mini-hairbrushes in their handbags. The Reiss skirt looks pretty nice but, again, budgetary considerations can’t be pushed too far aside in late-January and I spy posh rucksacks slightly further down the Measure list this week. I could really do with a rucksack to help avoid dropped shoulders on all my long walks, so I might put a bit of cash into that.

Conclusions:

  • iPhones can do all sorts of amazing things but they can’t really take decent snaps of magazine pages.
  • Sorry if the caption is in any way offensive today.
  • What is good is how differently various styles make you behave. I found this get-up put some new dance moves into my repertoire, a loping swagger into my walk and, curiously, a series of chimp noises into my lungs.
  • Liv’s family has some pretty eccentric dressers in it, which meant nobody batted an eyelid when I walked into the room looking like a Janet Jackson backing dancer on steroids. Relaxing.
  • Great timing on the herring/birthday curry front. Only one more day of oily fish to get through.
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Banana caramel cream pie and a week off consuming

Posted in Fashion, First impressions, Recipes by guardiangirl on October 20, 2009

On Friday night I cooked the remaining recipe for last week: Dan Lepard’s banana caramel cream pie.

Sainsbury’s was out of bananas but for a load of very green ones or a massive multipack of fairtrade ones, which I bought. When I got them home I realised there was no weight on the packet so I had no idea how many to use. I plumped for one in the sauce and another sliced up under the meringue. I added a very, very liberal amount of rum and brandy, and used a mixture of thick chantilly cream and mascarpone. I made the meringue properly (good girl, no slacking) with my hand blender, which worked a treat.

Liv arrived a bit later, we finished off the labneh with celery sticks (and she pronounced it delicious), then we tucked into the pie in front of a DVD. After one slice each we were pretty tipsy – not sure if this could really have been the pie’s doing alone, as we were drinking the remaining brandy with 7up as an accompaniment. It was delicious anyway, however intoxicating, and a spoonful of mascarpone on top cut through the sweetness a bit. As much as I complained when I had to eat pie every day, you can’t really beat a good one, and this was that.

Banana caramel cream pie

Banana caramel cream pie

 

Rum and brandy pie

Rum and brandy pie

I woke up the next morning to discover that I was 30 years old, so the rest of the pie made a good celebratory breakfast before I popped out to buy the paper. To my delight I discovered the whole mag is given over to a retrospective of the noughties this week, which means no cooking and no shopping all week – just outfits. It was a much-appreciated birthday present. Off I trotted to the pub in my party dress, and there I stayed, with all my pals, for a very long time. What a brilliant night – I have yet to recover. Here follow this week’s outfits so far:

Carrie Bradshaw

Carrie Bradshaw

Barry Bradshaw

Barry Bradshaw

 

Skinny denim

Skinny denim

Chubber denim

Chubber denim

The It bag

The It bag

 

The nosebag

The nosebag

 

Bling is the thing

Bling is the thing

 

Grim is the bling

Grim is the bling

Conclusions:
  • Alco-pie: a grand foodstuff.
  • Labneh: gets nicer with time.
  • A week off cooking, reorganising furniture and searching for elusive garments: sublime.
  • Being 30: yes.